Wife screams “YELLOW CAR” and jabs at the air in the direction of her target. In what was probably the most dangerous driving experience of my life the whole of our little family became embroiled in the most competitive game on the planet: YELLOW CAR. Causing family feuds, arguments and verbal abuse we played the game to a point where we all had to agree to stop for the benefit of our relationship. It was only then we discovered the game has a twist in its tail: Once you start – you can’t stop!
How to play the game
Drive or walk along a road. If you see a yellow car you:
1. Point your finger at it.
2. Shout at the very top of your voice YELLOW CAR. If you are first this gets you a point.
3. Like the umpire in tennis you instantly recount the score for everyone playing.
If you don’t shout it does not count.
The car has to be yellow not gold or beige.
There are no winners – there is only the person currently in the lead.
When do you stop playing yellow car?
You never stop. Once you start this game you are playing it for life. This we found was unfortunate in the following situations:
1. At Mevagissy driving along the harbour wall with a sheer drop and Wife spots a yellow car the other side of the harbour. She shouts yellow car so loud that I think I’m going to hit one of the tourists and nearly swerve off into the sea.
2. Wife and Boy get so dissalusended with my success in the game they decide to team up and are instantly in the lead by 10 cars. Naturally I get the hump and don’t speak to anyone for 10 minutes causing them to increase their lead by a 2 cars.
3. When you pass a full supermarket car park and the driver takes their eyes off the road to scan the hundred or so parked cars.
After these situations I ordered the car to stop playing but immediately broke my own command when a little yellow mini appeared in my rear view mirror. Once you start you just can’t stop…….
We arrived home and the following day Wife took Boy and his mate on a walk to the park. Returning they stood in my studio doorway and recounted all of the yellow cars they had seen on their way too and from the park. I protested that I was not even there at the time…. This however does not matter I thought as Wife announced the new scores. A plan was forming in my devious mind…. Wife has now returned to work after our holidays, boy and friend are in a summer camp and working at my computer and I have access to Londons road camera network: