Occasionally you come across a photo that stops you in your tracks, picks you up by the scruff of the neck and throws you back 26 years all the way to 1987.  I found this photo today in a dirty old diary at the bottom of an old school bag.  The following years included being held down by a hairdresser mate and his assistant, friends shaving it in my sleep, wife’s consistent eyebrow plucking and the eponymous Jenny Jordan getting her hands on it.

I don’t miss it now but I know that under the skin I am still Monobrow!



Red Valentino – SS14 – Long Necked Flower Fairy

Little Dumpling Flower Fairy
Long Neck Flower Fairy

Someone once said “If you can’t say anything good don’t say anything at all’…….MMmmmmm……….

Mario and Pier have spoilt me rotten for the past three seasons with their Red presentation.  Cohesive and joined up.  Presented creatively and with love.  This season someone dropped the dishes and in glueing them back together created a miss-matched dinner service.  That’s not to say that individual pieces aren’t lovely – they are, it’s just that as a whole presentation it’s not as cohesive as the last three.  Different stylist perhaps?  Wrong model choice? Something in the shoot team not working……….

It leaves me hanging………

John Patrick – Sweet but in a Good Way – SS2014

John Patrick - Sweet but in a Good Way
John Patrick – Sweet but in a Good Way

That’s sweet” is one of the killer put downs of everyday life.
Sweet” hissed through gritted teeth accompanied by a  knowing nod is a cooler person than me looking at something they desire.
Sweet but in a good way‘ though is me trying to say in as unpatronising way as possibile that I like this collection.

Of all the collections I’ve scanned from NY SS14 so far its the one that’s lodged in the mind.  Perhaps its the HUGE trousers (see the earlier Joke post here).  Perhaps its that I like the idea of the ‘The return of the baggy’ but keeping the fabric tight on the natural waist as if to say “I’m not hiding anything under here“.  For me the whole collection works.  there are no stray bits, I like the girl John Patrick has presented me.  Not enough to date – she’s far to sweet for that – But in a good way – Yes?

See the collection here

PS.  A distant echo of Stella?

Auspicious Moments in Fashion – London Denim – The Huge Look

London Denim - The Huge Look
London Denim – The Huge Look

In 1947 Dior swept wartime austerity under the carpet and launched The New Look onto a fashion starved world.

Now in 2013 ‘He’s A Talented Boy‘ brings you a London Denim exclusive “The HUGE Look”.

Speaking from his North London Apartment this afternoon Creative Director Simon King said

Of course the real credit has to go to an elite creative team I put together in the playground this morning.  Their brief was to bring me somthing cool fresh and new.  They have not let me down.  As I said, It started in the school playground.  I was handing out vintage London Denim jackets to the team ‘Short and Curly‘ and ‘……PS‘  when one of them tried it on their Daughter and presto The HUGE Look was born.”

……PS SaysI was like standing there and he thrust this jacket out at Short and Curly,  she took and and tried it on.  Well it was just too large for her – how we laughed
Short and Curly then says:  “Yeah it was too big for me then I had this absolutely cosmic idea – what if I put it on my little baby.  Well you can see the result – how we laughed
Simon says:  “I saw her putting the jacket on the kid and instantly knew it was going to he huge for her – I almost wet myself laughing
……PS SaysAnd thats when I said ‘that’s a huge look!’ All of the birds stopped singing, the children in the playgound turned to look at Simon, the clouds parted and the sun shone down on him
Simon says:  “God it was like a blinding light came out of the sky.  THE HUGE LOOK! I shouted out loud
……PS and Short and Curly:  “Genius!

Its not known how this look will manifest itself on the highstreet, how all the Talented Designers out there will reinterpret this idea for their own collections or how the talented stylists will deal with an idea of this magnitude but you can be sure of a couple of things:

You heard it hear first and this is going to be HUGE!

Read up on Diors 1947 New Look here

North Londons Misty Morning

This Mornings Misty Garden
This Mornings Misty Garden

While breakfasting this morning spotted Charlotte the spider sitting in the middle of a dew drenched web.  Wife called out to Boy who instantly popped out to see if there were any messages written in it.  “She’s a hard working spider” Boy commented.

If you’ve read the book or seen the film your life is not complete.

Check out the book here
Check out the film here

This Chicken is NOT FOR SALE

Chicken - NOT FOR SALE
Chicken – NOT FOR SALE

Driving through Burford and stopped at the Antique centre on the side of the road to stretch legs and have a nose.  Fell in love with a great ceramic chicken egg basket.  Wallet out I asked the owner for the price.

“She’s not for sale” he said. 
“Oh”  I said.  Thinking that’s strange,  this is a shop and in shops you display things you want to sell….
“Why?”  I asked
“We just thought it looked nice sitting on that sideboard” he said

Resentment building in my tummy.  – I’m a consumer –  This is a shop –  I live in a capitalist society – I am a capitalist – I WANT TO CONSUME – I WANT THE FRIGGING CHICKEN!

“Is there no price you’d sell the Chicken for?”  I forced through A clenched smile.
“The chickens NOT FOR SALE” he stated bluntly.

Visit the Antiques Centre Here – Don’t expect anything to be for sale though.

Those Summer Knights

Thse Summer Knights
Thse Summer Knights

It’s the end of summer and a few weeks ago the eMail was buzzing with Danny and Sandy’s summer party.  Yesterday we made our way to the last event of the season.  A farewell to a summer of hang out days and crazy clubs .  Danny and Sandy were our fairy hosts with massive welcoming smiles flitting too and frow sprinkling their magic fairy dust over us.   Just when you thought the cocktails couldn’t get any better, the burgers any juicier, the company and music better mixed the band struck up a long low note.   JAZZ RIOT TOOK THE STAGE:  A collection of seven brass instruments lead by a cocky checked shirted frontman cooked us up to a frenzy on the dance-floor beneath the stars.  Mexican waves lapped over the lawn and we all joined Danny and Sandy the party wave.    A fantastic end to the summer and what was my take-away from the event – Danny and Sandy throw AMAZING parties and JAZZ RIOT ROCK!

For the last couple of years I’ve loved the reinterpretation of music into different genres.  It all started for me when I heard Nouvelle Vague –  Imagine Too Drunk to Fuck in a bossanova style and you’re halfway there.  I’ve followed this with the Pick’in On Series which takes Europes Final Countdown into Bluegrass……  There are loads more…..

I have a theory that this inspiration for this started with Ally McBeal.  I remember their reinterpretations in the bar when songs would be sexily sung by Vonda Shepard and Ally’s best mate Renee (Phowaaa).

Check out all these guys,  Especially JAZZ RIOT – Turn the stereo up full blast and dance like you’re Danny and Sandy. – Its the end of Summer Knights and they deserve to be celebrated!

Check out:


And Ally McBeals Vonda Shepard – CAN YOU BELIEVE SHES 50 – And still so HOT! Here